When you’re in Oakland and want a sexy date night spot, all roads point to Friends And Family. The women- and queer-owned cocktail bar is perpetually bathed in a soft pink glow that makes everyone look (and feel) hot. Come here with someone you like and make eyes at each other over rose-infused cocktails, buttery yaki onigiri, and a slice of truly beautiful carrot cake.

Even before this queer-owned downtown Oakland bar officially opened in April 2020, there were whispers in queer circles about the space on 25th Street that offered upscale cocktails, a rotating menu, and regular programming to spotlight local artists and artisans. Sit in the backyard or find a cozy spot inside, where the low lighting sets the mood for dancing and flirtatious conversation. Order Mom’s Carrot Cake, which is, you guessed it, made by owner Blake Cole’s mom, and a San Michele…My Belle cocktail if you’re in the mood for vermouth.

While Friends and Family doesn’t explicitly identify as a “queer bar,” it makes the list as a honorary option due to their LGBTQ+ affirming atmosphere, staff and overall essence. We love Friends and Family because they serve food(!!) with plenty of vegan and non-vegan options, have a spacious indoor seating area, as well as an backyard patio that does not disappoint. The quirky, mid-century modern vibes are truly immaculate for day or night affairs, with seating arrangements that are great for 1:1 conversation.

Friends and Family serves original cocktails and elevated diner classics (such as a fancy grilled cheese) in a vibey, perfectly lit space. A semi-circle bar flanked by a backlit mirror reflects the convivial atmosphere that spills out onto a back patio. But don't just come here for the drinks: the bar's programming is helping people find love the old fashioned way and the employees seem to genuinely love their jobs, earning this restaurant-bar a spot on North America's 50 best bars list.

By 2021, Oakland’s downtown also saw the opening of Que Rico, the Latinx-focused venue on 15th Street. It’s home to drag and dancing, as well as parties-with-a-purpose like Queer Qumbia, which recently fundraised for Palestinian Youth Movement and Arab Resource and Organizing Center. Also in 2021, Summer Bar & Lounge opened its doors in Old Oakland, and now boasts a packed weekly program of karaoke, drag and go-go dancers.

Artichokes and cocktails at Friends and Family, lobster thermidor and more cocktails at Sobre Mesa, a selection of desserts (and more cocktails) at Veridian, then nightcaps at Low Bar. The next morning, it was strong coffee and princess pancakes at Daughter’s Diner…and then I went back to bed for the rest of the day. Do I recommend a college-level bar-and-restaurant crawl after over a year of sheltering in place?.

// You’ll feel right at home at the quirky, inclusive, queer + women owned Friends and Family (468 25th St.), where the cocktails are on point (they even make their own vermouth) and the proceeds from your binge drinking are reinvested in the community. // Bury your toes in the sand while you sip on tropical drinks at Sandbar (2418 Broadway). It’s about as close as you can get to the beach without leaving Uptown.

The interior of the date night location is small, but tastefully arranged with tables for two. Each table is adorned with candles and fresh flowers, creating an intimate and romantic atmosphere. The bar features an extensive selection of tequila and mezcal-based drinks, appealing to a variety of tastes.

Friends and Family is the kind of place you didn't know you were missing - a place where a friendly bartender is always prepared to ease your mind, make you a perfect cocktail, and the food excites.